How to handle a difficult employer

So you are a great worker and you are very productive. You are very committed to the quality of your work but your employer never seems to appreciate you. This employer always has something to complain about. Some days it just seems crazy.

One of the biggest reason why employees resign from their job is not because of the company or because of the work they have to do, but because of the personality of the employer. The stress from working with an employer that is difficult leads to poor performance, sleepless nights, and arguments with your spouse and depression.

OMG! A horrible employers will have you driving to work dreading every turn of your cars wheels. Sometimes you think it might get better because you have completed some work that everyone else says is incredible only to have your employer through it on the ground and humiliate you. You feel like you have done everything and you are on your last nerve and you are ready to quit, but understand there are additional options you might try. Having a good relationship with your boss is like the relationship with your spouse. It takes work and you have to grow it. Unless of course you are part of the Trump administration, then you are screwed. But I digress. Most employees that don't understand this dynamics and think that hard work is the key. However, when your expectations and your employer's expectation are not in alignment your work effort will not be appreciated.

You will find some employees who have had years of high performance reviews all of the sudden are looked upon with distain. Yes, they are doing the same job but the employer or manager has changed. This can lead to depression and low self-esteem. So it is important to recognize that even if your boss is good today it is important to pay attention to the connection.

Learn how your employer likes to communicate. Understand the frequency of the communication and how it should be delivered. A lot of communication now a days is being done via social media platforms such as twitter.

Put yourself in your employer's position and try to understand the pressures and stress the employer is under. If you are in a position to assist in removing these pressures that will really help your position in the work place.

When your boss doesn't respond, or criticizes you, instead of getting immediately defensive, think about becoming curious. See if you can identify themes as to when and why your boss gets upset. If you can identify themes, you start to understand what's most important to him or her. Again, you can choose to disagree with their perspective and say they don't have a right to their response, or you can seek to understand. The more you understand about what they care about, and why, the more you can connect issues to their point of view.

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